Children all over the world are finding pornography before they even hit middle school – simply by innocently playing online games or researching for a school project. Or, all too frequently, they have a friend show them porn on their unmonitored smartphone. Does this sound like your story?
What happens next? Innocent curiosity often spirals out of control, hooking children at a young age and rewiring their sexual scripts.
Honestly, that’s why you (and millions of others) may be wondering what’s wrong as you begin to suffer the serious effects of a porn addiction. Now is the time to act and take back your life! But first you need some vital information about the harmful effects of porn.
What is porn addiction?
The term porn addiction, still hotly refuted by some sexologists, may be defined as inability to control repetitive sexual behaviors. More simply defined, it’s a compulsion to watch porn while feeling unable to stop even if you want to.
The World Health Organization lists pornography use as a potential Impulse Control Disorder like other addictions, specifically Compulsive Sexual Behaviour Disorder (CSBD) in WHO’s diagnostic manual, the ICD-11.
“Compulsive Sexual Behaviour Disorder may be expressed in a variety of behaviours, including sexual behaviour with others, masturbation, use of pornography, cybersex (internet sex), telephone sex, and other forms of repetitive sexual behaviour.”
Why is it so addictive?
From biting into a perfectly grilled burger to the thrill of surfing at sunrise, our brains and bodies are lovingly wired to enjoy a rich abundance of pleasures.
However, we can fool and overload our brain’s reward circuitry by porn use which produces almost limitless, easy, unnatural highs.
Porn use hijacks the dopamine reinforcement system in the brain, says Dr. Andrew Huberman neurologist and author, creating a toxic chemical roller coaster leading to physical highs and lows.
For comparison, a recent study (2024) maps the brain’s reward system in online gamers versus pornography users. “The results of the present study confirm and extend findings of previous studies (Klucken et al., 2009; Liberg et al., 2022; Markert et al., 2021; Stark et al., 2019), showing activation in reward circuitry.”
To restate the study results: online gaming lights up less of the brain’s reward circuitry than pornography use does. It’s not hard to see why. Porn excites the brain and body with free, seemingly limitless highs.
But pornography should come with this warning: beware of dangerous side effects.
Let’s dive into the potential consequences and effects of porn addiction.
The most common effects of porn addiction
Behavioral addictions can have dramatic consequences such as ending up on the streets begging for personal needs like food and drink.
Likewise, porn addiction wreaks havoc on mind, body, and relationships.
However, many don’t realize how much a porn addiction has affected them mentally, emotionally, and physically until after they get a wake-up call, like losing an important relationship. Check out this brief list of the more subtle negative effects of porn addiction.
Physical effects
- Early onset erectile dysfunction
- Loss of sleep/ fatigue
- Loss of libido
- Lack of interest in exercise and personal hygiene
Emotional Effects
- Shame
- Depression
- Poor self-image
- Anxiety
- Loneliness
- Sexual dissatisfaction
Social Effects
- Isolation from family and friends
- Intimacy anorexia and selfishness
- Damaged relationships
- Divorce
- Job loss
Long-term effects of porn addiction
Remember how hard it was to screw up your courage to talk to your first crush – let alone ask them out on a date? Hard work, effort, and learning are a vital part of worthwhile, real relationships and intimacy.
Over time a porn addiction trains the brain and body to expect fast and effortless sex without a real relationship.
Why is a porn addiction bad for you? For starters…
5 amazing life-skills you can’t learn from porn:
- how to value – not objectify – women
- how to have decent conversations
- how to read social cues
- how to focus on making someone else happy in a relationship
- how to truly value yourself
Again, Dr Huberman notes that getting orgasms from porn pair-bonds people with pornography instead of a real person by releasing oxytocin, a feel-good chemical. This has serious consequences over time.
10 terrible effects of a porn addiction:
“I’m sorry this is happening to you… the man you’re with isn’t even his true self. He’s simply the shadow of a porn addicted man. Thinking that you aren’t pretty enough, or that the only escape is suicide, isn’t true, either.” ~ online forum anonymous note to a betrayed wife
- Erodes honesty and trust in relationships due to lies about porn use
- Warps your sexual attraction
- Desensitizes your heart and mind to sexual violence.
- Encourages coercive control in relationships
- Cheapens your view of sex – unlimited access to air-brushed beautiful women
- Undermines your ability to enjoy real sex
- Turns you into a shadow of who you could be
- Damages your self-image and confidence
- Creates boredom and detachment from whole-hearted living in this wild and wonderful world
- Cheats you of creating a positive legacy for your loved ones
How porn addiction affects the brain
What does a porn addiction look like – or how is it similar to other addictions?
Neuroscientists note four major brain changes in addiction very similar to brain studies on porn addiction. These brain patterns progress as follows:
- Sensitization – increased cravings for porn
- Desensitization – a numbing of pleasure responses (many note escalating porn use over time to compensate)
- Dysfunction of the prefrontal cortex (PFC) – weakening of self control
- Dysfunction of stress regulation – studies show addictions create disrupted stress hormones and possible gene dysregulation
What can cause porn addiction
While people turn to porn for different reasons, here are a few basic reasons many turn to porn.
Emotional triggers
Shame is perhaps the greatest emotional trigger, the most inescapable cause and effect of a porn addiction.
Shame and trauma
For many, pornography becomes their emotional coping mechanism, after they accidentally discovered it as a curious child. That’s why it’s extremely important to understand your personal emotional triggers – the different reasons you turn to pornography to self-soothe.
Therapist and author Sam Jolman states that shame must always be addressed: “At some level pornography use is always a form of ongoing dissociation. You are fleeing something in your body, something in your life, something in your relationships.”
Healthy shame vs. toxic shame
Dr. Andrew Bauman agrees, noting that during his porn recovery he experienced healthy shame – grief and sorrow for the way his pornography abuse hurt others and himself.
“Feeling a healthy sense of shame is the part of the grieving process that leads us to restoration. That is humility.
…Healthy shame brings an increased self-awareness, whereas toxic shame curses and ignites our self-contempt.”
– Dr. Andrew Bauman, How Not to Be An A$$, Essays on Becoming a Good Safe Man
Your personal cycle of negative emotions such as loneliness, frustration, stress, and anger need to be understood and addressed in a healthy way to overcome porn addiction. Facing shame is vital to understanding yourself and your porn battle.
Behavioral patterns
Behaviors are signposts of inner struggles, not clear-cut causes of porn addiction. Often a person struggling with problematic porn use may struggle with co-addictions such as:
- Gambling
- Drug or alcohol addiction
- Internet addiction
- Gaming addiction
That being said, certain health conditions could be linked to higher risk of compulsive sexual behaviors including porn addiction.
Pre-existing conditions
According to WebMD, here are a few underlying health issues/diagnoses that have been linked to higher risk for porn addiction.
- Dementia
- Parkinson’s (if treated with dopamine)
- Epilepsy
Mental health issues may include: narcissistic personality disorder, depression, anxiety, and even obsessive-compulsive disorder.
Don’t let this list hold you back or make you feel resigned to a porn addiction. Many have struggled and overcome porn in spite of these issues. To get started you need positive support, connection, and possibly treatment.
Treating the effects of porn addiction
“The chickens always come home to roost. You don’t get away with anything!”~ Dr. Jordan Peterson’s Rules of the Universe.
Once you come to grips with this truth, you’re ready to take ownership of the problem. Here are some immediate steps you can take:
- Join a porn recovery support community.
- Cut access to online porn with filters, blockers, and accountability.
- Try Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to break negative thought patterns.
- Enlist a personal accountability partner.
- Utilize movement and mindfulness for a holistic approach to mental health and porn addiction.
The accountability approach
Want to get fit? Have financial freedom and reach wellness goals? You’ll need commitment and self-accountability. If you’re able, it’s a smart move to hire a coach.
Often one of the very first things a good coach will do is ask you to identify and track your personal habits and progress – to be aware and accountable.
Online accountability to another person is also a proven, powerful tool in breaking free from pornography. That’s why Ever Accountable created its accountability app which empowers you to become self-aware of your online habits.
Yes, it requires stepping out of your comfort zone, because if you try to “cheat” and watch porn, someone else will see.
But the rewards of accountability are amazing to experience! You’re no longer alone in the fight, and you can celebrate wins big and small with an accountability partner.
To help you accelerate healing, we’ve created a downloadable Habit Tracker to help you identify your triggers or weak spots leading to porn use.
Download our Habit Tracker tool
To help you accelerate healing, we’ve created a downloadable Habit Tracker to help you identify your triggers or weak spots leading to porn use.
Common questions and answers about porn addiction
Am I addicted to porn?
Two key factors to take seriously when asking this question are:
- You’ve tried repeatedly to quit porn and can’t stop.
- You’re seeing negative effects of porn use in your relationships and productivity.
You can self-evaluate by taking our porn addiction quiz. It’s also a good idea to ask a porn and sexual addiction therapist to help you.
Who is at risk for a porn addiction?
- People struggling with loneliness and depression
- People exposed to porn at a young age
- People who are abused mentally, physically, emotionally, or sexually
- People with unlimited access to online porn (no online boundaries)
Does trauma cause porn addiction?
Trauma is listed as one of the potential root causes of a porn addiction. Like many behavioral addictions, porn use is an attempt to soothe pain, past or present.
What does porn addiction look like?
When you’re unable to stop looking at porn, or you keep craving more and more porn while trying to quit, this is a pretty solid indication your brain pathways are wired to porn.
You may feel like you’re in an endless cycle of depression and shame and can’t get off!
Can porn addiction cause mental health illness?
While researchers differ on this topic, there’s little doubt that porn addiction harms your mental health in subtle and obvious ways.
After watching porn for many years, quitting porn becomes a journey of discovery, seeing how beautiful life can be.
Conclusion
“The final chapter of your story has not yet been written.
You must change for YOU!…
What type of man do you want to be for the remainder of your life?
How do you want to die?
... I would much rather go out fighting for what matters.”
– Dr. Bauman
3 steps you can take right now to overcome the effects of a porn addiction
Don’t wait! Start writing the next chapters of your story today.
- Download a porn accountability app on all of your devices.
- Choose a trusted accountability partner.
- Download our Habit Tracker.
It’s a big important decision – being willing to change YOU – but no one ever tells us they regret quitting porn. Never!
You may have lost a lot to a porn addiction, but you can go forward fighting for what matters most: your purpose, your loved ones, and for those who believe – your relationship to God.
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